End of year report - Part 2

So, to the second half of the year which, for me, started in August with regular customers JayHenge taking steampunk tale 'Inktomi and the Skyship', first run by Wyldblood in 2022, for their anthology The Apparatus Almanac. JayHenge work slowly but produce large collections; this one is still accepting submissions, hence don't expect publication any time soon.

Then nada until October, but, like buses... First (and it happened on the first), 100-Foot Crow take my drabble 'Dominoes Tumbling'.

Then three hits in three days. Graveside Press come in for 'Doctor Herzog's Collection', my L. Ron Hubbard Writers of the Future Competition finalist from 2017, for their Tiny Terrors strand. Ten-thousand-word stories are hard to place; having been a near miss several times, it's good that this has finally found a home. No news on a publication date yet, though.

The same day, Story Unlikely, who had already taken 'Snake' to podcast, decide they'll print it as well. The pod is here - good to know someone out there liked it - no news on the words-on-a-screen publication as yet.

Then, two days later, Legiron Press take my Dartmoor-set eldritch comedy 'Too Few Surnames' for their twenty-fourth anthology, Monster. That just missed their Halloween publication date, but given they took it less than a fortnight beforehand, that it's out at all is a minor miracle.

...but it may explain why they didn't ask for any exclusivity period in the contract, enabling me to sell it (for buttons, admittedly) a mere fifteen days later to Three Coin Theatre for Liminal Tales, an evening of performed story readings at London's Water Rats on 12th January. The trailer's here - I think my story is the only one not to be read by its author, being in the far more secure hands of actor Esme Pitman.

The same November day I also get my 70s-set story 'Tip of the Tongue' accepted by Tales to Terrify, only to wake up to the fact that they don't pay for flashes when the contract arrives. As I only write for money - fame optional - I withdraw as quickly and with as much dignity as possible, promising to pay closer attention to the fine print on submission pages. Yes, reader, I was that time waster.

One last acceptance of the year, and a nice one to end on, as it's the return of Steve Capone, this time for sleep depravation horror story 'Second Amendment' for Whisper House's second anthology, Dread Mondays. That makes it 22 for the year.

And three days later it was Christmas.

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2084 - The Meschera Bandwidth

2084. The world remains at war.

In the Eurasian desert, twenty-year old Adnan emerges from a coma with memories of a strictly ordered city of steel and glass, and a woman he loved.

The city is the Dome, and the woman... is Adnan's secret to keep.

Adnan learns what the Dome is, and what his role really was within it. He learns why everybody fears the Sickness more than the troopers. And he learns why he is the only one who can stop the war.

Persuaded to re-enter the Dome to implant a virus that will bring the war machine to its knees, the resistance think that Adnan is returning to free the many - but really he wants to free the one.

24 0s & a 2

Twenty-four slipstream stories.  Frequently absurd, often minimifidian, occasionally heroic.

End of year report - Part 1

Having tried over the last few years to submit a story a day, and having both missed and overshot that target, for the second year running I've managed the magic 365 submissions. It was a target I screamed towards like Bodie in a Capri for much of the year, to the extent that I've only sent out four efforts in the second half of December in order to skid to a halt, Professionals-style, on that totally arbitrary and meaningless figure.

But, before we begin, some bad (taste in the mouth) news.

My last acceptance of 2023 was a story for a Nirvana-themed horror anthology from Book Slayer, to be called Negative Creep. It got as far as signed contracts and advanced reader copies going out for review. Then... nothing. The project froze, like a mosquito in sap, but with less chance of a Spielbergian reanimation. 

I've had projects which haven't come to fruition - shit happens - but not when ARCs have gone out and reviews been posted. And I've usually heard from the publisher, not from others via social media. But in this case they've just left everyone, thirty writers, hanging - not a single word of apology or explanation. Just a black hole.

As well as being utterly fucking unprofessional, it leaves authors confused as to whether we can shop our stories around again, or are they now lost in some Schrodinger's cat publishing netherworld? Have they, in any legal sense, been published or not?! So, please understand when I send out this short and heartfelt message to publisher, Roxie Voorhees, on behalf of all those affected: YOU UNMITIGATED CUNT.

Rant over.

January 2024. First sale of the year: Sci-Fi shorts taking my weird reflection on consumerism, 'Auntie'. And, had I known they'd use this image, I'd have tweaked the team of lawyers in the story to suit.

January also saw that most-rare phenomenon of two acceptances on the same day, although it was possibly not that odd as they were both for Shacklebound anthologies. Drabble 'Heaven or Hell' appeared in Drabbledark III in March, available from Amazon. The other, a reprint of another drabble, 'Working Late', is slated to see the light of day in Chronos 2 early next year.

Just one sale in February, a flash, the snappily titled 'God’s Gift to His Creation, and the Price We had to Pay for It', in Extrasensory Overload from Angry Gable Press. I've just finished reading it, and liked it.

March was a good month. First came news that 'Thus with a Kiss I Die', my Shakespeare-tinged body-swapping corporate-versus-academia longish short story first published by Aurealis would get a second burst of the limelight in Best of British Science Fiction 2023, my fifth appearance in the series.

This was tempered later in the year with the news that BoBSF would be on hiatus next year. I hope to see it return in 2026, maybe less-confusingly titled Best of British Science Fiction 2026? Best of British to editor Donna Scott and her Slab Press projects if she's reading this.

Late March saw 'Formula 719 - A Cure for Ennui', a black comedy about the counter-productivity of relying on technology to get us out of the holes we dig for ourselves (to me) or straight sci-fi (to, seemingly, everyone else) made it into the British Science Fiction Association's Fission #4.

And, two days later, Imagitopia said they'd run 'Devil Ray at the Doorway', previously published by Medusa Tales, as a podcast. They're currently on hiatus, but promise to be back and to run the stories already picked.

April saw another brace of acceptances across a handful of days. On the 11th, Parsec Ink took half (yes, half) of my story Charabanc for their Hospitium anthology, part of the Triangulation strand. Editors Greg Clumpner and Brandon Ketchum may have had the help of the Devil someplace as it was on sale by early July.

And, on the 13th, 'The Other Brother Grimm', about the one you've never heard of, was taken by Mystery and Horror LLC for my second appearance in their Strangely Funny series. It's yet to appear.

May saw another two acceptances.  Firstly, 'Sérénade Mélancolique in A Flat', a dark piece, more atmosphere than horror story, that I wrote thirty or so years ago, hidden in a virtual drawer ever since, was picked up by Dark Holme's Nightmare Narratives for a song (see what I did there?). The website's since disappeared, and I've made my punning title hard to Google, so the only evidence that it was ever published is probably this blog. Ooops.

And then, on my birthday, Whisper House Press took my flash, 'One, Two, Three' for their Costs of Living anthology. I'm slightly confused about timelines, as I've had my e-book copy for a while, reviews are appearing online, and my video interview was done in early autumn, but everything says a September 2025 release date. Having met him on screen, I like the chief Whisperer Steve Capone and what he's trying to do, and wish him and Whisper House Press well.

In June, I managed to get my name on the front page of the Grinder twice at the same time, with acceptances two days running. Firstly, Wyld Flash came back for some repeat business, running my ambient flash 'We Are All Made of Stars' the following month.  Then, the next day, Donna Scott's Slab Press came in for 'The Trouble with Vacations', previously only available as an Overcast podcast, for its Laughs in Space collection. That was published in August.

And, finally as far as the first six months goes, Illustrated Worlds took one of my favourite stories, 'Faivish the Imbecile', first published in 2021 by The Quiet Reader. I haven't heard a peep from them since, but their website suggests they're still active. I assume I'm in a queue. How British...

So, fourteen acceptances in the first six months. Find out in part two how the second half of the year went.

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2084 - The Meschera Bandwidth

2084. The world remains at war.

In the Eurasian desert, twenty-year old Adnan emerges from a coma with memories of a strictly ordered city of steel and glass, and a woman he loved.

The city is the Dome, and the woman... is Adnan's secret to keep.

Adnan learns what the Dome is, and what his role really was within it. He learns why everybody fears the Sickness more than the troopers. And he learns why he is the only one who can stop the war.

Persuaded to re-enter the Dome to implant a virus that will bring the war machine to its knees, the resistance think that Adnan is returning to free the many - but really he wants to free the one.

24 0s & a 2

Twenty-four slipstream stories.  Frequently absurd, often minimifidian, occasionally heroic.

Now you can work from home at anything!

Yes, we’ve now reached such a state of joined-up interconnectedness that you can now do any job, absolutely any job whatsoever, from anywhere, anywhere you damn well please. Here I am, working hard at signing punters’ copies of PS Publishing’s marvellous Shadowplays anthology, sans bookshop, sans books… and sans punters!

Shame that in this new utopia we have to rely on Royal Mail, though…

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My Thoughts are with You. Your Thoughts are with the Authorities for Calibration Against Societal Norms.

Award-nominated science fiction and slipstream author Robert Bagnall’s second anthology of twenty-four stories, variously bleak, funny, bleakly funny or – very occasionally – optimistic.

  

2084 - The Meschera Bandwidth

2084. The world remains at war.

In the Eurasian desert, twenty-year old Adnan emerges from a coma with memories of a strictly ordered city of steel and glass, and a woman he loved.

The city is the Dome, and the woman... is Adnan's secret to keep.

Adnan learns what the Dome is, and what his role really was within it. He learns why everybody fears the Sickness more than the troopers. And he learns why he is the only one who can stop the war.

Persuaded to re-enter the Dome to implant a virus that will bring the war machine to its knees, the resistance think that Adnan is returning to free the many - but really he wants to free the one.

24 0s & a 2

Twenty-four slipstream stories.  Frequently absurd, often minimifidian, occasionally heroic.
“Brilliant stories, well written!” (five stars, Amazon).

Get yerself to that there London Town

I only wrote a matter of days ago that those good people at Liminal Tales would be doing a performed reading of my story 'Too Few Surnames' "sometime in 2025". 

Well, turns out 'sometime' means January 12th, at London's Water Rats on Grey's Inn Road. If you're in the Big Smoke, wondering what to do in the grey days of winter, get yourself along. I hope you have a blast.

And, for those who missed it, here's last year's performed reading of one of my stories, 'The Ultimate Vegan Curry', by British Columbia's Delta Literary Arts Society.

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Click on the images or search on Amazon.

You're here, so surely you know how to do that?

My Thoughts are with You. Your Thoughts are with the Authorities for Calibration Against Societal Norms.

Award-nominated science fiction and slipstream author Robert Bagnall’s second anthology of twenty-four stories, variously bleak, funny, bleakly funny or – very occasionally – optimistic.

  

2084 - The Meschera Bandwidth

2084. The world remains at war.

In the Eurasian desert, twenty-year old Adnan emerges from a coma with memories of a strictly ordered city of steel and glass, and a woman he loved.

The city is the Dome, and the woman... is Adnan's secret to keep.

Adnan learns what the Dome is, and what his role really was within it. He learns why everybody fears the Sickness more than the troopers. And he learns why he is the only one who can stop the war.

Persuaded to re-enter the Dome to implant a virus that will bring the war machine to its knees, the resistance think that Adnan is returning to free the many - but really he wants to free the one.

24 0s & a 2

Twenty-four slipstream stories.  Frequently absurd, often minimifidian, occasionally heroic.
“Brilliant stories, well written!” (five stars, Amazon).

Things what fall through my letterbox

One of the pleasures of being a semi-professional (i.e. very occasionally I manage to persuade people to pay me) author is being sent copies of the anthologies I've made some small contribution to. These days it'll typically be an e-book, but sometimes a physical dead-tree-derived copy will arrive. Wahey! 

(This, no doubt, pales into insignificance compared to being a professional author, which would mean being sent boxes of books, yours and other people's, as well as money, drugs and naked dancers, on top of being bought Michelin-starred meals, holidays, cars, and granted freedom from disease, boredom and ennui. And eternal youth. Jealous? Me? Never.)

A red-letter day occurred earlier this month when one shelf on my Billy bookcase (80cm wide, not 60cm, I'll have you know) became insufficient to hold all the volumes which include my name somewhere on the table of contents. So, I thought it may be useful to show you some of the great items that have materialised through my letterbox.

So that you can go out and buy them yourselves. Not as an exercise in narcissism. Just to be clear.

BSFA's fourth Fission anthology, published in July, included my story 'Formula 719: A Cure Ennui'. This was written as a black comedy, but in reading the excellent introduction this appears to have been missed by the editors entirely. Having said that, on re-reading it, the humour was so black and bleak as to have been effectively redacted. Still one of my favourite stories, though.

Triangulation's 'Hospitium', their annual themed anthology, was also published back in July. It's got my story, 'Charabanc', which started life as a tale of black shuck, but relegated him to sleeping on a bus.

Legiron's 'Monster' is, as the name suggests, a monster anthology which missed Halloween, despite the pumpkins on the cover, coming out on Guy Fawkes Night, but probably during the day. Not that there's a Guy Fawkes Day. My Dartmoor-set 'Too Few Surnames' will also be performed on the London stage (as in, read with feeling) sometime in 2025 by Liminal Tales. The book seems to have been given a five-star rating on Goodreads by the author first listed in the description. Just saying... I'm sure it fully deserves it.

PS Publishing's 'Shadowplays' took so long to come out - my story 'The Charmed' was accepted in February 2023 - I was beginning to wonder if it ever would. This was the one I blogged about Cosmic Roots and Eldritch Shores describing as "unsavoury and unpleasant with a disturbing ending". Buy the book and decide for yourself.

Lastly, but very not least, the wonderful polymath Donna Scott (who, having included me in five Best of British Science Fictions (resting, not dead!), I regard as a quiet champion for my work) has republished - but not reprinted - my previously podcast 'The Trouble with Vacations' in Slab's 'Laughs in Space'. Hear it there, but please read it here.

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Click on the images or search on Amazon.

You're here, so surely you know how to do that?

My Thoughts are with You. Your Thoughts are with the Authorities for Calibration Against Societal Norms.

Award-nominated science fiction and slipstream author Robert Bagnall’s second anthology of twenty-four stories, variously bleak, funny, bleakly funny or – very occasionally – optimistic.

  

2084 - The Meschera Bandwidth

2084. The world remains at war.

In the Eurasian desert, twenty-year old Adnan emerges from a coma with memories of a strictly ordered city of steel and glass, and a woman he loved.

The city is the Dome, and the woman... is Adnan's secret to keep.

Adnan learns what the Dome is, and what his role really was within it. He learns why everybody fears the Sickness more than the troopers. And he learns why he is the only one who can stop the war.

Persuaded to re-enter the Dome to implant a virus that will bring the war machine to its knees, the resistance think that Adnan is returning to free the many - but really he wants to free the one.

24 0s & a 2

Twenty-four slipstream stories.  Frequently absurd, often minimifidian, occasionally heroic.
“Brilliant stories, well written!” (five stars, Amazon).

Doing better than anything Led Zeppelin ever released

Or anything taken from Fleetwood Mac’s Rumours. Or I Ran, by Flock of Seagulls. Or Summer of 69 by Bryan Adams. Or - and this one leaves my gob more than mildly smacked - Bowie’s Changes. But only, I hasten to add, if you restrict that apparently outrageous claim to singles released in the UK.

Because, this blog is in the UK Top 20.  Of science fiction blogs. Which is a far more important top whatever to be in, as I'm sure you'll agree.

Apparently what you're reading, right here, right now, is a "thought-provoking commentary on the genre's storytelling nuances... a blend of sharp critique and personal insight reflecting on how narrative elements—ranging from hard sci-fi concepts to surreal imaginings—should balance credibility and creativity.. exploring the thematic intricacies of fiction while raising questions about plausibility in speculative storytelling, emphasizing both intellectual engagement and entertainment."

Bloody hell. I am humbled. And more than delighted to find out I have, apparently, 36 Twitter followers which, given I don’t tweet - at least with any authorial hat on - I take to be an act of faith on a par with booking hotel rooms in Baku in order to see the ‘Orns lift the European Cup in 2027.

I would, however, take slight issue in the claim that I only post monthly, when only nine out of the last 128 months have been single-serving months, and only two years in the last decade have had fewer than two dozen musings.

Signing out on October's second post.

#

Click on the images or search on Amazon.

You're here, so surely you know how to do that?

My Thoughts are with You. Your Thoughts are with the Authorities for Calibration Against Societal Norms.

Award-nominated science fiction and slipstream author Robert Bagnall’s second anthology of twenty-four stories, variously bleak, funny, bleakly funny or – very occasionally – optimistic.

  

2084 - The Meschera Bandwidth

2084. The world remains at war.

In the Eurasian desert, twenty-year old Adnan emerges from a coma with memories of a strictly ordered city of steel and glass, and a woman he loved.

The city is the Dome, and the woman... is Adnan's secret to keep.

Adnan learns what the Dome is, and what his role really was within it. He learns why everybody fears the Sickness more than the troopers. And he learns why he is the only one who can stop the war.

Persuaded to re-enter the Dome to implant a virus that will bring the war machine to its knees, the resistance think that Adnan is returning to free the many - but really he wants to free the one.

24 0s & a 2

Twenty-four slipstream stories.  Frequently absurd, often minimifidian, occasionally heroic.
“Brilliant stories, well written!” (five stars, Amazon).

The apocalypse: your fault

The very nice people from 100-Foot Crow have run my drabble ‘Dominoes Tumbling’ about the end of the world and your part in it. You’re welcome.