I’m having
a difficult 2025 so far, story sales-wise.
After making my first of the year four
days into 2025 (‘Planes of Illusory’, a previously unpublished flash, to Angry Gable Press’ forthcoming anthology This Exquisite Topology: ACollection of Happy Abstractions), it’s been a total blank since. This decade, my
submission to acceptance ratio has gone from 40 (2020) to 30, 18, 26, to 17
last year, a downward trend I was getting used to. This year, I’ve submitted 75
for that one bite. It’s earnt me $25. Financially, if that was ever my reason for
writing, I may as well panhandle outside the Co-op.
My lifetime record against the big boys in the pro markets is
even worse. Since 2017, when I started recording all my submission on the Grinder, Clarkesworld have seen and rejected 76 of my stories, Cosmic Roots and Eldritch Shores 71, Asimov’s 67, Fantasy & Science Fiction 66, and Apex 65.
But every so often I get a sign that they’re not entirely
deaf to my hammering on the door. Trevor Quachri, editor of Analog, recently said “I like your style of writing and
suggest that you try us again”. Okay, he probably has that phrase on a keyboard
shortcut, but, hey, it’s a nibble in the
pseudo-fishing game of short speculative fiction submissions. Glass always half
full, and all of that.
One silver lining is that my consistent failure in the pro market means I still
qualify to enter The L. Ron Hubbard Writers of the Future Competition. But even
there, where I have got used to honorable (sic) and silver honorable (sic)
mentions, I seem to now be casting my seed on stony ground.
Last year, I thought I’d write something specifically for
WotF, more of a novellete than just a short story, something with a bit of
sweep and grandeur (think Oscar-bait movie rather than just movie). Something
actually set in space rather than, say, Chingford. A tad over 9000 words, I
polished it until it shone. I thought it was up there with, if not better than, my WotF finalistfrom 2017.
It didn’t even get an honorable (sic).
I had a very nice email exchange with Joni Labaqui, contest director. She agreed, if I resubmitted the following quarter, she’d steer
the story to a different first reader. I resubmitted. I can only assume this is
a me-problem, because it came back unplaced again.
WotF send a very nice, albeit generic, email with the possible
reasons for one's abject, screaming failure. So, I invite you, dear reader, to
join me in my attempt to work out what the fuck went wrong…
We appreciate your talent and hard work to produce this
story. However, this one is not quite ready for us yet. Keep writing though,
don’t give up. In order to help you, we’ve provided the list below of common
reasons that a story needs some work. Definitely consider revising it
accordingly and entering it again.
Here are the most common reasons:
Failure to Launch: Your story begins too slowly.
There isn’t a lot of room in a short story for long introductions. As much as
you might love the introductory scene, if it doesn’t help the story hit the
ground running, consider whether you are beginning your tale too soon. Is there
a good narrative hook? Have you let the reader know where they are in time and
space? Are you introducing your protagonist—or any character—for the reader to
follow? And please, don’t send us stories that begin with the character waking
up. Most editors hate that trope. Give us interesting action. Make us want to
follow your character through the entire manuscript. Make friends with your
dynamic verbs. Don’t “was” us to death.
There are 300 words, during which the main
character is introduced (“an ambassadorial magus and me, a fast-tracked
cadet as aide”), before we get to “destiny came without warning, one moment calm, the next a
disorientating, ear-splitting snake-hiss of jetting gas, a flash of darkness
followed by pulsing washes of scarlet, the muffled roar of engines replaced at
a stroke by a choking metallic whine and the shriek-shriek-shriek of alarms,
and the vessel shaking like it was pulling itself apart.”
Off the starting grid after less than 3% of the story. Conclusion: Not guilty.
Needs more Science Fiction or Fantasy Elements: This
contest publishes only speculative literature. We do not accept mainstream
stories. If there is no science fiction or fantasy element introduced early
enough for us to recognize, that also helps to bring about the conclusion of
the story, this may be the reason why you are receiving this letter. Just
because a story takes place in a science fiction or fantasy setting doesn’t
make it science fiction or fantasy. If the plot can be moved to any other
setting, with any other characters, with no change in the outcome, it’s
probably not speculative literature.
The fifteenth and seventeenth words are ‘ship’ and ‘hyperspace’,
so context should be clear. It deals with disembodied intelligences seeking bodies to occupy. And did I mention it’s all set in space? Is that not SF enough?
Conclusion: Not guilty.
Not Sticking the Landing: Your story peters out, or
doesn’t end in a way that satisfies what you promised the reader in the
beginning. Beginning with one character and ending with another but making no
reference to the initial quest at the end, or going off on a tangent that leads
the story in a completely different direction confuses and frustrates the
reader. You might have submitted an excerpt from a longer work without making
it stand on its own. Make sure that you finish your plot.
The story is about “a secret diplomatic mission to bring peace to a
conflict promising to spill over from Negus Umbra to other worlds” (top of page
2). The narrative, which centres on how to continue the diplomatic mission
after being stranded in space, ends with Negus Umbra’s fate sealed, determined
by the protagonist’s actions and decisions – and mistakes. It doesn’t just hang
together, it’s laser focussed.
Conclusion: Not guilty.
Playing in some else’s sandbox: You may have decided
to write a story using a trope that we have seen far too often. Vampire or
werewolf stories, angel stories, secret aliens living among ordinary people,
the protagonist suddenly discovering that s/he is immortal, powerful, the Chosen
One, the long-lost child of the monarch are all well-worn and tired. Those
tropes may even have vocabulary which has become all too familiar in similar
stories, and will make yours seem like a poor copy. If you have a new and
original take on a typical plot and write it well, send it! We’d love to see
it. Or you may have impinged on copyrighted or trademarked worlds. Fan fiction
is not allowed, especially in an ongoing property, such as a popular movie,
television show, game, or book series. But even if the universe you chose is
well out of copyright, you may not have a unique enough take on it.
Not fan fiction. No well-worn tropes, other than a
spacecraft suffering an accident. And whilst I don’t claim to have invented the
idea of disembodied alien intelligences requiring bodies, it’s not exactly the Benjamin Sniddlegrass level of well-worn, is it? And I’ve just Googled the names of aliens and
alien races I cooked up by blindly stabbing at the keyboard. Qu’TyTh’Gth,
anyone? No, didn’t think so.
Conclusion: Not guilty.
Too Much Violence: Stories featuring egregious
violence, gore, or torture are not suitable for this contest. If it’s not
necessary for the plot, then cut it out. Otherwise, revise your story and send
it elsewhere. Send us something else that fits our guidelines.
Yes, there’s blood, there’s violence, but short, sharp,
story-relevant, not dwelt on, and no more than in a family-friendly movie like Star Wars.
Conclusion: Not guilty.
Too Much Sex, Sensuality or Profanity: Our
anthologies are meant to be read by young adults on up. If the theme is too
adult, or there are “on screen” sex scenes, it’s not for us. If you can tone it
down, you may rewrite and try again. Otherwise, there are other markets that
will accept it. Some sensuality is fine, even welcome, if it works in the plot.
One F-bomb won’t scuttle your story. Long passages of swearing aren’t suitable
for this contest.
They’re stranded in space. Oxygen is running out. There’s
no time for sex. Maybe there isn’t enough?
As regards profanity, I once had an email
exchange with Joni Labaqui regarding a different story when I defended it as
having ‘no more swearing than around a normal British family dinner table’. I think
she was a bit shocked when I unpacked that for her. I can only conclude Americans don’t swear, like women
don’t fart. That said, I had WotF’s puritanism on my radar for this one, and the strongest
word here is ‘steel’.
Conclusion: Not guilty.
Children’s story: As above. Our anthologies are
meant to be read by young adults on up. If the plot is too simplistic, if the
characters are led by the nose to their conclusion, that’s why you’re receiving
this back.
No, it’s really not.
Conclusion: Not guilty.
Devotional or Political Content: If you have a
specific point to make that feels as if you are lecturing the reader, please
consider a market that publishes that kind of material. If we are overwhelmed
by your agenda, we ask you to tone it down and concentrate on a plot that will please
a wide variety of readers.
If there’s an unwitting agenda at play, other than ‘we’re
all doomed’, I can’t spot it re-reading it. But then, allegories tend to go over my head.
Conclusion: Not guilty, at least not deliberately.
Reality check: Your plot or character behavior is
wildly implausible, so much that it stopped us dead. This doesn’t mean that
magic can’t exist. It means that a character in danger of losing his life isn’t
going to philosophize about unrelated subjects for sixteen pages. Is the reward
for fulfilling the quest ridiculously small or entirely pointless? Characters
don’t work against their own self-interest. Even self-sacrifice fulfills some
inner need. Look at your plot from the point of view of a stranger. Would a
reasonable being act that way?
Okay, this one is subjective, but I had it front and centre
in my mind whilst writing. The story concerns a disembodied alien intelligence
that the inexperienced protagonist goes up against and loses. Her decision to
do so is, I think, consistent with her character and the impossibility of her circumstances.
But, if my fault falls under any of these headings, it may
be this one. The story is written to an eight-sequence structure (as most of my
longer stories are). But I’ve skipped the eighth. The seventh is where the
character gets to their lowest point, when all seems doomed, before snatching
victory from the jaws of defeat in an uplifting finale. But, in this story, there
is no snatching, no finale. The antagonists win. Sometimes life is like that. Sometimes
stories need to be like that.
But I’ve noticed an increasing habit amongst publishers, particularly
American publishers, to reject the downbeat on principle, as if there's now an unwritten law stories have to be uplifting, that the good guys and girls need to win every time. Reality check? I think that’s exactly
what I’ve done. Deny reality in stories, and it’s a small step to denying
reality in the real world. Which sounds a bit too much like the world we're living in. Writers of the Future? Maybe too much like Writers of the Present.
Conclusion: Not guilty for reasons of insanity. Or should it be for reasons of excessive sanity?
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My Thoughts are with You. Your Thoughts are with the Authorities for Calibration Against Societal Norms
Award-nominated science fiction and slipstream author Robert Bagnall’s second anthology of twenty-four stories, variously bleak, funny, bleakly funny or – very occasionally – optimistic.

2084 - The Meschera Bandwidth
2084. The world remains at war.
In the Eurasian desert, twenty-year old Adnan emerges from a coma with memories of a strictly ordered city of steel and glass, and a woman he loved.
The city is the Dome, and the woman... is Adnan's secret to keep.
Adnan learns what the Dome is, and what his role really was within it. He learns why everybody fears the Sickness more than the troopers. And he learns why he is the only one who can stop the war.
Persuaded to re-enter the Dome to implant a virus that will bring the war machine to its knees, the resistance think that Adnan is returning to free the many - but really he wants to free the one.
24 0s & a 2
Twenty-four slipstream stories. Frequently absurd, often minimifidian, occasionally heroic.
“Brilliant stories, well written!” (five stars, Amazon).